12 Guys on How Having Sex Changed In Their 30s


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“I used to have sex or masturbate twice a day. Now it’s more typically once.”

1. “I’d say things definitely slow down. It’s not like I turned 30 and suddenly stopped having sex. But I get… I don’t know, busy, I guess? Other things start to take priority. I think 22-year-old me would think that sounds insane, but that’s just how it goes.” —Robert, 32

2. “I’m currently single. I guess in some senses, I’ve probably slowed down in terms of my sexual appetite. But I’ve also found myself being much more confident and sure of myself. I guess I’m not as sex-focused but sex feels… easier?” —Josh, 30

3. “The sex is the same. The amount of sex is maybe slightly less, if I’m being honest with myself.” —Robert, 30

4. “I had an insanely high sex drive in my 20s. It’s still high, but I’ve found myself turning down sex sometimes, like if I don’t feel good. It used to be that it didn’t matter how I was feeling. I could have been hungover at death’s door and still at least made an attempt at sex.” —Nick, 31

Couple cuddling in the bedroom

5. “This isn’t really a symptom of being older specifically, but once you have kids, sex definitely changes. When they’re newborns, you can still fit the sex in pretty regularly. But once they’re old enough to be able to barge into your room when they wake up in the morning or have a nightmare… you tend to fit a lot of quickies in.” —Robert, 35

6. “I think sex slows down a little, I guess. I used to have sex or masturbate twice a day. Now it’s more typically once.” —Justin, 34

7. “I don’t think anything has changed, at least not on my end. Thirties are the new 20s, and my sex life is still pretty great.” —Drew, 34

8. “I’m not going to lie, I’m not as spry as I once was. I’m getting old. I don’t have the stamina I used to and I now use terms like ‘spry.'” —Robert, 31

9. “I’ve found that I’m having more sex. I feel like with dating in your 30s, people cut the bullshit more and there’s no mind games. More sex on the first date. I think it’s really that people just know what they want, or don’t want, at this point.” —Eric, 30

10. “Well, I’m married now. So there’s that. My wife and I experiment a lot more than we used to. We’ve been dating since college. We used to fuck like rabbits then, whereas now the sex itself is a lot crazier. Quality over quantity.” —Robert, 30

11. “I know the stereotype is that your sex drive drops huge in your 30s, but I haven’t really felt much. I have sex less often, but I think a lot of that is just taking care of my career and my obligations. Sometimes my wife and I just get home too late and we have to be up too early. If I was living my old college hours, I’d probably be taking advantage of that.” —Scott, 32

12. “I’m definitely starting to feel more out of shape. It’s not like I’m in danger of pulling a muscle, but I definitely can’t go as hard for as long as I used to. The sex is still great, though. I can’t really complain.” —Robert, 31